Why do we need other people to help us feel valid, as if surrounding yourself with people confirms to you that you exist? After 35 years of battling loneliness while surrounded by a world of good people is it not time for me to find in myself my own best friend?
The lesson for me:
If I want to be alone, and am taking steps to have my own space and be alone, then I must learn to be there and feel the stillness and contentment in my own heart knowing I am still and content in myself, with no help from anyone else. No one on the planet can make me happy but myself. I need to be content to be with myself and still without hoping there might some day be some other heart to fill the space in me where love lives. I need to fill that space with love of my own, love for myself, love for my own existence. I need to know that when I am alone, I am ok... or even entirely happy.
I also must remember that I am guilty of holding myself apart when there are opportunities to be inclusive. I have a rich tapestry of friends. I must remember to embrace the gift of a lifetime of experiences with good people who are still only a phone call away.
If I don't learn this lesson I will never feel at rest in my heart, and I will go on hurting people because of it.
I have to be gentle. I need to stay present in this.
4 comments:
Remember Molly: "We're all in this alone." (-Lily Tomlin, I think)
xo
Ha! Leave it to Lilly... thanks :)
Jenny hit the nail on the head. All, means you are part of the exclusive group called humanity. Even in our aloneness, we are never alone.
why I think being your own best friend is awesome: anything can be great if you have a good travel companion, true? and you always have yourself...
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